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working philosophy and practice

I take great pride in the ethics around my working philosophy and practice and, after almost 10 years working in the sexuality field, I know that they are constantly in question and in flux.  But I can say this much:

I conduct all of my sessions from the basic premise that you have everything you need, within your body and your psyche, to go fully into the realm of consciousness or eroticism you seek.  This doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t bring along any favourite objects, items of clothing, or toys to your session; on the contrary, I encourage you to take whatever measures you’re able to ensure that our time together has all the right ingredients.  While I have several personal limits about play I cannot engage in, I make no judgements about your desired types of play and, if they’re not compatible with mine, will endeavour to refer you to someone with whom you might find more common ground.

approaching with awareness

I incorporate my own understandings of yogic and tantric practice into the way I play, which includes an emphasis on breath, communication and feedback, and sensory and energetic awareness.  BDSM reaches out into the world around us for erotic source material.  It expands our erotic potential through ritual, transformation, and flirtation with the thresholds of our bodies and minds.  Tantra does the same, thus making them a perfectly fabulous pairing.  You don’t need to know anything about tantra to session with me, and I am not a licensed tantra teacher; I simply have a personal and professional interest in what it has to offer us.

poltics of pleasure

I am a pleasure activist.  I believe in the right to pleasure and freedom from shame.  I believe in the emancipatory possibiltiy of erotic pain and pleasure.  I also think it’s just a really good time to fuck around with bodies and minds and enjoy pleasure or pain for its own sake, with or without any ‘esoteric’ qualities.  I prefer to play without goal-orientation where possible, but even if we know exactly where we’re going, we can exercise plenty of creativity and adventurousness in getting there.

safety in session

My practice is strictly safer-sex.  I make use of barrier methods and risk-reduction strategies for both of our health and safety.  I do not provide ‘natural’ sexual services.  Please don’t ask, as refusal may offend.  When sessioning together, it is MY definition of and standards for safer sex practice which will be adhered to.

I always session with a safeword or signal, which are established between us before a session commences.  Safewords are ALWAYS to be respected and are taken seriously.  While I can honour your interest in pushing your boundaries during a session, and can facilitate that within the session space, please do not ask me to play ‘without a safeword’.

I always leave time at the end of a session for a smooth transition out of the headspace we’ve created.  A sort of ‘comedown’ if you like.  This is an element of my duty of care which I take seriously, and it’s also important to my headspace as a practitioner that I close out a session with care.

plays well with (diverse) others

I work with people of all ages over 18, all body types, all genders and all sexualities.  I also very much enjoy working with couples or multiple partners; this is a particularly juicy way to play and the more energy there is in the room, the more there is to discover.  I also enjoy the genuine chemistry that exists between lovers, and whether I’m amplifying that or actually participating in it, sessioning with lovers gives me an extra special buzz.

I have completed the Touching Base PDAT training, which helps to educate sex workers to make their services accessible to people with disabilities.  The premises from which I work are wheelchair accessible.  Please feel free to contact me for more information about this.  I am able to provide outcalls for people with disabilities, though a travel surcharge may apply for those outside of the inner Melbourne metro.

discretion

I exercise discretion in all communications and will not call or SMS you without your prior expression of consent and availability.  I value your information privacy and any details you share with me about your identity are kept confidential.  I will always make an effort to ensure that your entry and exit from my playspace can be conducted discretely.